With the arrival of a new year, it is time to defeat Dermatillomania once and for all. For those who are unaware, Dermatillomania (or Excoriation Disorder) is a compulsive skin picking condition. As the definition suggests, it is the urge to pick at one’s skin uncontrollably. I have been suffering with it for a long time, and if you would like to get more background, you can read this blog post.
The purpose of this series is to document my steps towards recovery in terms of Dermatillomania. I want to be able to look back at my progression and hope to shed some light on what daily life is like living with a disorder such as this. I also hope that others can look at this for inspiration of how they can recover, and to tell them that they’re not alone.
My main picking areas are my chin, my fingers and my back. So through this series, I will be showcasing various spots, scars and other nasty wounds from my picking. The images at times will get rather gruesome so if you are a squeamish type, I suggest you don’t read on. You will need to keep in mind that I will not sugarcoat this disorder in any way and needs to be told as it is.
First of all, I’m going to start with my fingers. I have been picking at my fingers for as long as I can remember and they are my main picking point, As you can see, my thumbs are healing from previous pickings, while two of my fingers have had a brutal picking recently. One finger in particular has been an unfortunate victim. I have been using nail clippers to help accentuate my picking but I also like to shape my nails with it and because I disfigure them so much, this nail has grown back with a chunk missing. On Saturday night, I was fiddling with it and managed to rip a giant chunk of it off, making it look seemingly normal again, but very painfully so. Since this incident, the nail clippers have been banished from my room never to be seen again. Yee-ouch.
Now onto my chin. My chin is a very unfortunate case, as it has always been ridden with acne even at 21. Last week got very bad with a wide range of spots which were big, red, pus-filled and painful to touch. No amount of face masks, tea tree or clean fingers could have got these ones away. My chin is like a Hydra at the moment; one goes and two more take its place. My friends and family have noticed my acne-ridden chin and they think it is rather unusual for me to be getting acne like this well after puberty hit me. With that in mind, I’ve booked a doctor’s appointment to see if there is anything they can do for me.
My back is pretty much the same story but it ends on a more positive note. I’ve been plagued with acne on my back for a long time, often getting very painful spots just under my shoulder blades. However, now that I take care of my back, the amount of spots appearing has reduced greatly. I still get an itch sometimes on my back which can cause me to pick at my spots, but it is very few and far inbetween. I owe it to the Boots Tea Tree and Witch Hazel Back Spray*, which has been a absolute lifesaver for me. A few sprays of this a couple of times a day and my back is kept clean from all the nasty spots.
That is all I have to report for this week. If you liked reading this post, please feel free to share it on social media and be sure to give me feedback on my social media pages, which can be found down below. I am going to try and update this series as often as I can, but it will depend on how my progress goes. In the next post, I will be recommending some products that I use to help me with dermatillomania recovery.
Do you suffer with Dermatillomania?